It Must Be True

For The Friday Chef, I bring you the horrifying truth about Cicadas. Their loud buzzing sound is Cicada-speak for Kill the Humans, they eat small children, and a Cicada smoothie means instant death. Oh, and they can be genetically altered to look like Ryan Seacrest. Sorry, TVJ. At the bottom of the web page it has a disclaimer about humor and "don't be stupid enough to believe anything on this page." That's just what they want you to believe. It's really Cicada-speak for "all your humans are belong to us!!"