Thursday, April 28, 2005

Make Your Child Go To School Day

Today is Take Your Child to Work Day.

If you take a moment to peer through your computer screen, you will notice that (much to her extreme dismay) TinyTuna is NOT here.

Oh, she wanted to be here. She begged. She pleaded. She even attempted the desperation argument, "But everybody else is going." Too bad for her. I was unmoved and I made her go to school. I was a mean mom.

It's not that I'm against children learning about work-place environments. It's not that I'm against the original premise of this day, which was, in fact, Take Your DAUGHTER to Work Day. It was meant to boost self-esteem and give girls exposure to the work environment. That became "unfair" to the boys, and now it is Take Your Daughters and sons To Work Day.

Whatever. Even if it were Take Your Grunty Rabbit To Work Day,
I'm not playing.

"Why Mean Mom?" I hear you ask. "Why not let TinyTuna come to the office? Why not be a positive role model for your child? FIE! FIE! For shame!"

I'll tell you why. According to the current school calendar, there is a Take Your Child to Work Day at least once a month, and usually more. In the 2004-2005 school year, TinyTuna has had 14 half-days, plus full days off for: Election Day (1), Thanksgiving (2), Christmas Break (10), MLK Day (1), Presidents Day (3 days IN ADDITION TO THE WEEKEND = 5 Total), Spring Break (5) and Memorial Day (1).

So that count again is:
14 half-days off
23 full days off

And these numbers do NOT include the holiest of holy: Snow Days.
I believe our 2004-2005 total for this unexpected joy = 3.

14 half days / 26 full days

NOW -- compare that figure with my workplace calendar:
Number of half days off= ZERO
Number of full days off = Thanksgiving (2), Christmas (2), New Years (2), Memorial Day (1)

0 half days / 7 full days

When one compares time off, TinyTuna is still ahead of GreenTuna by 14 half days off and 19 full days off. She doesn't need a Take Your Child To Work DAY when she already gets a Take Your Child To Work MONTH.

TinyTuna can already do most procedures within my workplace. On top of that, she use a typewriter and a computer, check out materials, visit My Boyfriend, and get a high score on Real Arcade.

It's just things like fractions that she's not so hot at.

So, off to school she went. Pouts and all.
And I get my computer for the entire day.
Life is good, Mean Mom. Life is good.

1 comment:

Mrs. Wonderful said...

Lord, I wish we had talked before The Day. You make a good point.

And let's not forget all the weeks in summer when Wonder Boy will NOT be puttering around Granpa's farm (he doesn't have one - a farm, that is. Granpa has a house with cable. And a housekeeper.)

Newly single-mum that I am, I took the lad with me and made him work. What's more, I narrated about my job to him, sent him on errands (I work in a musuem and made him sketch things), and took him around to the Cake For The Guy In Accounting Who's Leaving.

There were no other children at work. So I felt I'd done my part.

And now I'm going to get a big bumper sticker for my car that says, "My Child Can Do Fractions Despite The Lack of Decent Salaries for Educators" or something realllllly radical like that.