Tuesday, February 21, 2006

The Lies Shack

I must admit, I laughed out loud this morning when I heard the tragic tale of David Edmondson, CEO of that venerable institution Radio Shack. It seems that Mr. CEO, having been caught with a professional resume that is more fiction than fact, has stepped down from his post.

He lied on his resume for RADIO SHACK.

I would have never guessed The Shack had such stringent employment requirements. Based on my local Shack, I thought employment requirements were limited to:
  • Must own one clip-on tie.
  • Must own at least one remote-controlled toy. Bonus points if it is a dinosaur.
  • Successful completion of the following essay: X-Box or Playstation, Which is the one true chick magnet?
  • Successful completion of the following essay: What is a chick magnet?
  • Completion of the training series: 1001 things to do with gold-plated S-Video cables.
I can't believe someone in the corporate hierarchy didn't smell something fishy on Mr. Edmondson's Shack-sume. After all, he claims to have received degrees in both Psychology and Theology. Sadly, Pacific Coast Baptist College offers no degrees in Psychology, and Heartland Baptist Bible College says he never received a theology degree.


Now, I've aided and abetted others in their pursuits of employment glory. I was always quite proud that I was able to transform stamping and counting daily forms into "statistical analysis." But for the Love of Moses, if you're gonna out and out lie, don't do it with a RELIGION DEGREE. Someone might put a hit out on you with a burning bush. Pick a lie that's at least plausible. Backwards Radio Shack Loner With No Social Graces? Magic Eight Ball Says: Engineering!

Now that Mr. Edmondson has a whole buncha spare time on his hands, maybe he'll go back and get those pesky degrees he could only dream up before.

Well, after he finishes Midtown Madness 3.

Even Shacksters have priorities.


TVJ said...

Based on your outline of Radio Shack requirements .. I'm a shoe-in to replace this guy. I have ALL those qualifications, baybeeee.

GreenTuna said...

Clip on tie???

Gary said...

Being an avowed techo-geek from awaaaaay back, I would apply - but alas, I have no clip-on ties. You know when I was a kid, that used to be my favourite store? I won't tell you how many electronics hobby kits that I put together from there. (Need a radio built? Gary's your guy!)

Sadly, up here in the Great White (and not so cold) North, Radio Shack has been taken over by Circuit City and is now called "The Source". Luckily, the stores haven't changed a bit.

*runs out to buy remote controlled dinosaur from The Source*

Jake Silver said...

Funny post. I dig it. Have not bought anything at RS in ages.