Friday, July 15, 2005

Friday Feast

It's Friday yet again. Let the feasting begin!

Appetizer: What is your middle name? Would you change any of your names if you could? If so, what would you like to be called?
1. Kay (Green Kay Tuna)
2. No, because then nobody would know how to call me for supper.
3. The Biggest Lottery Winner in US History!!

Soup: If you were a fashion designer, which fabrics, colors and styles would you probably use the most?
First of all, if I'm a fashion designer, the rest of the world is in deep trouble and should take stock in Hefty Bags and Whiskey Barrels. But, if I were a fashion designer who actually had a sense of fashion, I would incorporate a lot of natural fabrics instead of chemical-esters and artificial-ayons, because the long horned Polyester is an endangered creature. The colors would be natural colors because face it, have you ever seen a blue sheep? The styles? Comfy.

Salad: What is your least favorite chore, and why?
Judging by the fact that I just ran out of knives and tshirts, I might say dishwashing and laundry. But truth be told, my toilet just spoke in tongues, so I guess I'd have to say spending quality time with my Scrubbing Bubbles (DO NOT USE FOR PERSONAL HYGIENE) Toilet Brush.

Main Course: What is something that really frightens you, and can you trace it back to an event in your life?
Cemeteries, especially cemeteries with squishy grass. I do have a memory of walking past a small church cemetery near my Grandparent's house in Maryland, and seeing a man (he was probably a caretaker, but might as well have been a werewolf for all I knew...) straightening the tombstones by grabbing them with both hands and rocking them back and forth into place.

My somewhat irrational fears were further exacerbated this spring, as GramTuna, TinyTuna and I found ourselves on the wrong side of LOCKED GATES at Sleepy Hollow Cemetery in Massachusetts. After several moments of sheer panic, and a fair amount of driving from one gate to another, getting out of the car and actually trying the lock (really locked), examining the grounds near the gates to see if we could go around (no way), having more panic attacks and yelling, "This isn't FUNNY," we drove around a bit more and found yet another entrance that was still open. Once I calmed down, I vowed that I was never entering a cemetery at DUSK (the time it closed, by the way) ever again. I think Thoreau, Alcott, Emerson and Ichabod Crane would all understand.

Dessert: Where are you sitting right now? Name 3 things you can see at this moment.
On my butt.
1. My pirate ducks
2. Two screwdrivers (of the hardware, rather than barware variety)
3. A popsicle stick. Sans popsicle.





Daily Haiku -- Friday Free-For-All

Here, your Haiku roams free from the constraints of subject, content, or style. Anything you want to write, you can write, just as long as it's still a Haiku.

Man from Nantucket...
Damn! Lim-ric-ku just won't work.
Classic Culture Clash.

1 comment:

nlk said...

You are too funny!

If you're the biggest lottery winner in U.S. history, can I be the second? Thanks ever so.