BEDTIME FOR BONZO

While doing in-depth research on the correct spelling of Solla Sollew I ran across a website that performs a valuable public service: It gets to the point.



Book-A-Minute Bedtime, along with Book-A-Minute Science Fiction/Fantasy, Book-A-Minute Classics and Movie-A-Minute are ultra-condensed versions that strip out trivialities and timewasters like supporting characters, meaningless subplots and endless descriptions that only serve to waste your precious time. Forget the Cliff-Notes...everything you need is right here.



I suppose it is only fair to note that in essence these are spoilers. If you do NOT want to discover the ending to "The Very Hungry Caterpillar" I suggest you turn back NOW!



Book-a-minute. Bedtime

The Very Hungry Caterpillar

Once there was a caterpillar who ate holes in stuff and turned into a butterfly.

The End.



Book-a-minute. Bedtime

If You Give A Mouse a Cookie

Don't give anything to anyone.

The End.



Book-a-minute. Bedtime

Green Eggs and Ham

Some Creature: I won't eat green eggs and ham anywhere, anytime, under any circumstances.

Sam-I-Am: Try It.

Some Creature: Yum.

The End.



Book-a-minute. Classic

The Old Man and the Sea

An old man catches a fish that's too big for his boat. The fish gets eaten by sharks. Then he goes home and DIES.

The End.



Films

Die Hard

Alan Rickman: Har Har Har

Bruce Willis: Grunt sigh moan grunt holler yell sigh wince groan cringe grunt. (A chair BLOWS UP. Then the elevator BLOWS UP. Then a room BLOWS UP. Then the building BLOWS UP. Then the entire universe BLOWS UP. But the badguy STILL ISN'T DEAD YET. Then the badguy dies.)

The End.



Films

Sleepless in Seattle

Meg Ryan: I shall find out all I can about Tom Hanks and stalk him.

Tom Hanks: Your plan worked. I love you.

The End.



This has real possibilities. Think we could rewrite BB4?

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