Thursday, November 11, 2010

Hot Commodity

Earlier this week as we were making one of our several "last" trips to the grocery store (it takes several attempts before it becomes a reality),we were walking the aisles and going over the homework situation that was and was not going to happen while she is away.  One of her concerns was her Advanced Placement U.S. History Class ("APUSH" to those in the know), because they have an immense amount of reading to be done every week, along with thorough notes that need to be turned in.  Oh, and the textbook weighs about 15 pounds.  To my great delight I was told that her teacher had prepared reading packets for everybody who was going to be away.

This was very good news, because it had already been a frustrating week.  I had raced to the bookstore to grab a small, cheapish (read: loseable) copy of Macbeth to fulfill Brit Lit requirements, only to find out they weren't going to miss Macbeth after all.  They were going to miss "King Arthur stuff" ("...and some movie, which isn't Monty Python, so it's kind of a 'who cares' thing..." I was told), and said stuff was in the 17 pound Brit Lit book.  Off to the copy machine I went to wrestle the book and to make sure the microscopic footnotes weren't cut off, and left and right margins were still marginal.  So, to have the AP teacher prepare materials for several kids was unbelievably kind and wonderful and miraculous and magical.

As we stood in the grocery store, I said, "I think I should do something for your teacher,"  and then I turned down aisle 11 and grabbed the most precious gift I could think of: three boxes of tissues.  I was given the look of seriously mother? which I immediately ignored, and I told her to please give these to her teacher (last hour of the day) and tell her they were my thanks for preparing their homework for the trip.

Well, you would have thought that these three boxes of Puffs were more precious than Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh.  The story was that she walked in with the tissues (It was SO EMBARASSING) and explained the story to her teacher who practically did a dance of joy.  And then her friend walked into class a few minutes later, and exclaimed in an overly-excited voice, "WHO BROUGHT THE TISSUES!" and the teacher said, "Melanie did!" and her friend cried, "MELANIE, I LOVE YOU!!!!" and gave her a huge hug.

I think I may have found the perfect "in" in the educational system.  From now on when things are looking dicey, I'm going to send my kid to school with a couple of boxes of tissue for the classroom, and then we'll sit back and enjoy the accolades.  It's all about having what other people want.  Who knew that all the power and prestige of High School life lay in a simple box of tissue?

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