KAPUT
Given: Things Break. Sometimes you fix them, sometimes you replace them, sometimes you chuck them altogether. Certain things, however, send me into an absolute tailspin if and when they break. These include, but are not limited to:
1. Toilets
2. Computers
3. Cable TV
4. Washers / Dryers
5. Ovens
6. Garage Door Openers
As you can tell from my weekend moaning, I'm not doing well. Although my toilet has been plunged and the bathroom returned to its original state of grace, my computer is still sick. I found my one hundred percent legally purchased Office disc and reloaded the whole shebang, but that didn't fix the problem. And, to add insult to injury, reloading Office killed my dial-in settings, and I had long since thrown away that paperwork. By 12:30am I was stuck. Gah. This morning I defragged, just to feel like I was accomplishing something. After grovelling shamelessly before my systems person, she promised to give Bessie a look-see, so my CPU is now sitting in my office, waiting for some TLC. Since I know she will be tended to shortly, I have downgraded the situation from CAPS LOCK to leaned over. Pray for speedy results. If it isn't fixed today, I won't be able to kvetch on HamsterTime about Cowboy Joe and his bevy of bimbos.
In other news. I spent considerable time with TinyTuna this weekend, working on various homework projects. She successfully finished reading her next book report book ("My Teacher is an Alien" -- I give it a thumbs Meh) which gives us two full weeks to write her report and do her project. The report is ok, but I don't know about these projects. She won't mind them, because they are art related, but if I were in this class, I'd be pitching a fit. She has to make a tri-fold brochure talking about the book as if it were a sales pitch. What does this have to do with reading? Not a damn thing, as far as I can tell. But I'll let this one be -- I have other battles to fight.
Our other big project was studying for TinyTuna's rocks, earthquakes and volcano test. I have so many issues with this, I don't know where to begin. I stink at fourth grade homework. Rocks and stuff? I have no recollection, Senator. None. GramTuna found a vintage 1940s era book in her basement that was pretty darned helpful (GramTuna has everything in her basement, trust me). But in TinyTuna's class, there is no textbook. Evidently, this is not an unusual occurance. There are also no handouts. TinyTuna is relying on her notes. Her notes. Notes of a nine-year old. I looked them over. What do nine year olds remember? Lava burns your house. Sometimes lava runs slow enough that you can rescue your pets. These are her notes. Do they teach kids how to take notes? I'm sure they don't. So, watch out Mrs. Fourth-Grade Teacher. You're going to get a love letter from me today outlining what TinyTuna needs to be a more successful test-taker. For starters, please provide printed materials with clear definitions and diagrams. Although Google is my boyfriend, he can't fix everything, and right now Bessie is kaput.
My to-do list runneth over. More later.
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