From the files of things I wish I thought of --
I was talking to one of my students today who was freely sharing his political opinions, which happened to be Democratic. As he went on and on about Bush, he said, "He calls himself a compassionate conservative. What is that? WHAT IS THAT? It's like being an Optimistic Pessimist. Or owning a Volvo with a gun rack. They just DON'T GO TOGETHER."
Several minutes later I finally stopped laughing and picked myself up off the floor. My students are hella-funny.