Monday, December 20, 2004

To Be or Not to Be

There are those in this world who learn by instruction and those who learn by doing. I'm a hands on instruction manual be damned I'll learn by my own mistakes thank you very much kind of person. You could lecture me for hours, but unless I'm actively participating, I'm not learning anything.

I'm a doer.

Although I don't think being a doer is gender-specific, I do think that women and mothers tend to carry the doer gene to an extreme. We want to fix everything and everybody. We want to make it better, and if we can't, we'd prefer to transfer the burden of the problem onto ourselves, allowing us to be in control of the doing once again.

Because you see, when doers cannot do, we go a little crazy. When those inevitable situations arise where we cannot fix, touch, manipulate, or do anything for that matter to make things better, we feel helpless.

And then, what's a doer to do?

It can be hard to accept, but sometimes it's possible to do by simply being. It rarely occurs to doers to seek answers that go beyond glue or bits of tape or hammers and nails or bandaids or casseroles for neighbors, but there are other options. Whether you call it prayer or meditation or simply thinking good thoughts, the heart, mind, and soul can be a very powerful and effective instrument for healing, love and understanding.

Still it can seem as if it's not enough. It's frustrating to feel like nothing is happening. Who wants to be wasting time waiting for the next chorus of Kumbayah to roll around when we could be taking charge and doing something? The crux of the matter is, it's difficult to have trust in anyone or anything other than ourselves.

Trust is difficult. Trust is inherently non-egocentric and doers don't do that very well at all. Trust is the activity of last resort not even considered until all other avenues have been tried and tried again.

But why? Why do believe so strongly that if we don't do it, it won't be done right? Why do WE have to fix everything? Why do we trust only ourselves and put so little faith in ... faith?

The first verb learned in many foreign language classes is to be. Today is about being. Today is about letting go and putting trust in greater things. Today is about thoughts filled with happiness and peace, light and warmth, strength and courage, love and healing.

Je suis.
Ich bin.
I am.

I can do it.

1 comment:

Sarah said...

Maybe that's what music is for: to help us be.