Tuesday, April 13, 2004

SASH-AY

World Peace. The answer is world peace. The answer is always world peace, or someone or something that is somehow connected with world peace. Mother Theresa used to work. The Pope, Bishop Desmond Tutu, Nelson Mandela -- these are all credible answers. Removing land mines for world peace, fight anorexia for world peace, Give a hoot, read a book about world peace...



And on and on it goes. It is not difficult.



Poor Miss Oklahoma. When asked "Who would you like to have dinner with and what would you ask them?" She answered (wait for it ....) Justin Timberlake. And then she giggled. And then she said she'd ask him to show her some dance moves. OY.



Granted, this woman is all of eighteen years old, and the Miss Oklahoma pageant was her first pageant, ever. But still. Even I know the answer is world peace and not Justin Timberlake.



Personally, I thought she should answer that she would have dinner with someone who had command of the English language and then they would join forces to beat the author of the question with a grammar stick, but I digress



I can't find a web page that lists the hobbies they were rattling off last night during the big event. Nothing will beat "picnics" as a hobby, but one of my other favorites was "trying to play lots of different instruments." HA! I can't decide if the rest of the sentence read "because I have no attention span and can't stick to one instrument for more than a day" or "because I stink at every single one I try."



You can check out all the Miss USA glamour shots HERE, but allow me to categorize them for easier viewing:



My Neck is Broken

Miss North Carolina

Miss Oregon

Miss Idaho



My Hair has a Better Personality Than I Do

Miss Delaware

Miss Hawaii

Miss Pennsylvania



Ladies of the Evening

Miss South Carolina

Miss Iowa

Miss New York

Miss Utah

Miss Tennessee



Dazed and Confused

Miss Ohio

Miss Oklahoma

Miss Missouri

Miss Alabama

Miss West Virginia



Dude, Where's my Brush?

Miss Mississippi

Miss California

Miss Florida

Miss Oklahoma

Miss Massachusetts

Miss Nevada



All Your Brush are Belong to Us

Miss Georgia

Miss Illinois



What Not to Wear

Miss Vermont (Wallet accessories?)

Miss District of Columbia (Carmen chorus to the left, please)

Miss Washington (Toga Bondage-wear)

Miss Oklahoma AND Miss Texas (Singing the same dress blues)



This is a glamour shot?

Miss Alaska (Lost: One Scalp. If found, call...)

Miss Montana (Help, I've fallen and I can't get up)

Miss Rhode Island (One false move, BLAMMO! Right in the neck)

Miss Georgia (Wearing leopard is bad, yo)



Until The Miss Universe Pageant (June 1, 2004) in Quito, Ecuador, I wish you...

World Peace.

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